Movie Review: Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019)

WE GOT A HOLLYWOOD BUDGET MONSTER MASH FEATURING CLASSIC KAIJU, HOW COULD ONE NOT BE EXCITED ABOUT IT. *Calms down*. So let’s talk about this movie.

Ladies and gents… “Godzilla: King of the Monsters”.

When multiple ancient beasts awake from their slumber, the crypto-zoological agency Monarch have to find a way to stop them. Be it on their own or with the help of the titanic lizard known as Godzilla. Let’s cut to the fucking chase, this plot isn’t deep or nuanced. In the moments where it tries developing the human element of the story, it’s kinda dull. But whenever it’s about these ancient creatures having it out for each other, it’s a fucking blast. So plot-wise it’s a bit of a mixed bag. I mean, no one comes to a monster movie for plot, but when there’s a lot of time spent trying to develop it, it can get a bit distracting. So overall… mixed bag.

The characters in this… yeah, I didn’t care. Again, they tried giving them some development, but in the end it’s kind of shallow and cliched. And the cast does a fine enough job with their performances. There isn’t anyone here that I’d say is bad, just some who are better than others. My favorite was probably Charles Dance, who always had a bit of a self-aware glint in his eye, which made him kinda fun to watch whenever he showed up. The rest of the cast, including people like Kyle Chandler, Ken Watanabe, Vera Farmiga, Millie Bobby Brown, Thomas Middleditch, Ziyi Zhang, Bradley Whitford, Sally Hawkins, and various other actors was good. They all played it very straight, but no one was bad.

The score for the movie was composed by Bear McCreary, and I loved it. A lot of big, bold brass, a lot of panicky strings, some chorals… it all fit incredibly well with the kaiju calamity going on throughout the movie. And while I won’t spoil which, some of the tracks are absolute treats for… various reasons. Damn good stuff.

The movie was directed and co-written by Michael Dougherty, who I think did a great job with it. He has a great sense of energy and pacing, which keeps the moving driving along, never really getting boring and too slow at any point. And like with Gareth Edwards before him, he knows how to convey the scale of all the shit that goes on. And credit to the visual effects team for really bringing these creatures to life. The detail, the movement, it all looks fantastic. And man, the cinematography by Lawrence Sher is breathtaking. Some truly awe-inspiring shots exist in this movie. And when it isn’t breathtaking, it still looks quite good. All the technical aspects really come together wonderfully. Especially during the monster action, which I had a ton of fun with.

The movie just came out, so this data will change a bit over time. But as of writing, the movie has gotten quite the mixed reception. On Rotten Tomatoes it has a 38% positive rating. On Metacritic it has a score of 47/100. And on imdb.com it has a score of 7,7/10.

Look, this isn’t one of the greatest movies ever made. But I still had a lot of fun with “Godzilla: King of the Monsters”. It has a mixed bag plot, meh characters, really good performances, fantastic music, and fantastic writing/directing/cinematography/visual effects/action. Time for my final score. *Ahem*. My final score for “Godzilla: King of the Monsters” is an 8,74/10. So while flawed, it’s still worth buying.

My review of “Godzilla: King of the Monsters” is completed.

Ooooooh no. They say he’s got to go, GO GO GODZILLA!

Announcing The Month of Spooks 2018!!!

What is up, ladies and gentlemen? It is once again time that time of year when I get to announce one of my favorite things to do within the blogosphere. I am super excited to announce that for the fourth year in a row, I am hosting what I refer to as The Month of Spooks! For those who are relatively new to my blog, every year since 2015 I spend the month of October reviewing a ton of horror things, usually with some people tagging along on their own blogs. Like I said, it’s been a yearly tradition for me to do this, and I do not intend on skipping out on it this year. So what’s gonna happen exactly?

Well to be honest, I have no fucking clue. I have some general ideas of horror-related things I might wanna review, but nothing is set in stone right now. But I know we’ll find some cool stuff to cover. And I will hopefully get some badass bloggers with me this year as well.

The Month of Spooks 2018, are you guys excited? Because I sure as hell am!
Have a good one.

Movie Review: The Brothers Grimm (2005)

Before we get into the review itself, I want to apologize for my absence for almost two weeks. First I was busy, and then I got really sick. But now I’m back! Woo!

Ladies and gentlemen… “The Brothers Grimm”.

Jake (Heath Ledger, R.I.P) and Will (Matt Damon) are a pair of brothers who travel from town to town, defeating demons for the people. And by defeating demons I mean that they set up a fake demon based on local folklore, “defeat it”, and then get paid by the people of those towns. But these dirty rotten scoundrels are about to come face to face with something they never thought they’d run into… a forest filled with actual magical creatures. So now we have our dark fairy tail. And is this plot any good? There’s a lot of good ideas here, but in the end it’s a fucking mess. At times it’s a comedy, at times it’s a horror movie, at times it’s a whimsical fantasy, at times a family drama. It creates an inconsistent and messy blend that doesn’t work.

The characters in this I can see the potential of, but we only ever skim the surface of them. Heath Ledger (May he rest in peace) plays Jake, one of the two titular brothers. He has a love of fairy tales, and often shows signs of believing in them (at least more than his brother). He’s also a little bit of an idiot and a coward. He’s probably the closest we have here to a compelling character. Though that could also be because Heath Ledger is really good in the role. Matt Damon plays Will, the second Grimm brother. He’s more or less the leader of the two, and can be a bit of a jerk at times. And his character is… meh. Damon’s good though. Then we have Peter Stormare as an Italian soldier that the brothers travel with through the movie. He’s a bit of an idiot and chews all the scenery. And yes, Stormare is glorious in the role. Then we have Lena Headey as Angelika, a young hunter that the brothers run into during their quest and eventually join forces with. She’s a no-nonsense badass with a mysterious past, and while that sounds interesting, it’s only surface-level. But Headey is really good in the role. And we get some okay supporting turns from people like Jonathan Pryce, Mackenzie Crook, Monica Bellucci, Richard Ridings, and more.

The score for the movie was composed by Dario Marianelli, and I think he did a good job with it. His score is bombastic, emotional, quirky, and even has a bit of a fairy tale feel to it. It somehow elevates the movie above it’s mediocrity. It’s almost too good for whatever the hell is on screen at any given time.

This movie was directed by Terry Gilliam and I have mixed feelings. On one hand, his direction really helps sell the fairy tale style and even builds a lot of atmosphere. But it is devoid of any real tension, despite being part horror flick. And the CGI in this movie, good fucking god… it’s awful. I can usually excuse a little bit of bad CGI, but when you have so many awesome practical sets/costumes/props, the bad CG gets quite distracting, especially when it’s as prominent as it is here.

This movie hasn’t been very well received. On Rotten Tomatoes it has a 38% positive rating. On Metacritic it has a score of 51/100. Roger Ebert gave it 2/4 stars. And on imdb.com it has a score of 5,9/10.

While “The Brothers Grimm” has some good things going for it, I’d say it’s a bit too messy to recommend. It has a very messy plot, meh characters, good performances, good music, okay directing, and awful effects. Time for my final score. *Ahem*. My final score for “The Brothers Grimm” is a 4,98/10. So I’d recommend skipping it.

My review of “The Brothers Grimm” is now completed.

Feels good to be back.

12 Films of Christmas (Part 9)

Holy shit, we’re already nine part into this silly series. That means there are only three parts left… damn, time sure does fly.

Out of all the movies I’ve done for this so far, this is the only one I had set from the start since it’s a yearly tradition for me to do on the 21st of December every year. The movie (if you didn’t know from the image, you cave dweller) is “The Nightmare Before Christmas”. Jack Skellington (Chris Sarandon) is the pumpkin king, the very face of this magical place called Halloween Town. He has however gotten quite tired of Halloween and want something new in (after)life. Then one day while walking through the woods he stumbles upon a portal that leads him to Christmas Town, and this gives him the idea to take on christmas. And as you probably gathered from the opening of this paragraph, I love this movie, it’s one of my favorites. It has a fun story, fantastic animation from Henry Selick and his team, catchy songs, and some of the most memorable character designs in any movie ever. From the second I hear the opening notes to “This is Halloween”, it sucks me right into it and I am happy that it does. Out of every christmas movie available out there, this is my personal favorite.

What do you think about “The Nightmare Before Christmas”? And what’s your favorite Tim Burton movie? Leave any and all thoughts in the comments!
Have a good one!

The Month of Spooks 2017 Roundup

Hello there, ladies and gentlemen of the internets. Another Month of Spooks has come to an end, and it’s been a good one. There’s been spookums, there’s been hookums, and we’ve had a solid mix of horror stuff. So here’s a post to round up all the posts that have been done in the name of the Spook, both from me and from my guest reviewers (lovingly called my little Spookers).

Let’s just start with my stuff, since that’s the least interesting.
Insidious Movie Review
Wolf Creek Movie Review
The Lost Boys Movie Review
We Are What We Are Movie Review
Sinister Movie Review
Van Helsing Movie Review
Mindhunter Season 1 Review
Daybreakers Movie Review
Tucker and Dale vs. Evil Movie Review
Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein Movie Review
The Conjuring Movie Review
What We Do in the Shadows Movie Review
Stranger Things Season 2 Review
Get Out Movie Review
30 Days of Night Movie Review

Let’s see, that is… 15 posts from me… that’s not bad. But enough of me… time for my little spookers!

Sasha AKA. Chewbasha AKA. Binge Watch Bash

The first one to sign on for this silly thing was Sasha, one of my friends from twitter. She was intrigued about writing about horror stuff, especially since she seemingly wanted to do more things for her blog. I happily had her on board, and soon she started delivering quality posts. Now, she intended to write more posts than she did, but things got in the way for her. But what she did give us… was pretty fucking awesome.

Raw 
Pet Sematary
The Love Witch
The Invitation
The Voices

Those were Sasha’s awesome posts. NEXT PERSON.

Gavin AKA. MiniMediaRvwr AKA. Mini Media Reviews

The second person to sign on was Mr. Gavin. We’d had interaction on twitter and such several times before, but I was a little surprised when he seemed genuinely enthusiastic about joining in on my silly little thing. That said, I was also really happy because Gavin’s a cool dude and a good writer, so getting him on board was just awesome. He was also incredibly generous, giving us a metric buttload of posts. So let’s get into it.

Saw
Nosferatu
Audition
You’re Next
In The Mouth of Madness
Night of the Living Dead
A Tale of Two Sisters
The Purge: Anarchy
The Purge: Election Year
Angel Heart
The Wicker Man
Pulse
Baskin
The Fog
Haute Tension
The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari
Raw
Gerald’s Game
The Borderlands
Final Destination
Ouija: Origin of Evil
Hounds of Love
Dracula Untold
Inside
House on Haunted Hill
Creep
Happy Death Day

Thank you for that, Gavin… that was quite a lot. Anyhow… NEXT.

Craggy AKA. The Craggus AKA. What The Craggus Saw

For the second year in a row we have The Craggus tagging along for the Month of Spooks. Not only is he a good writer and a cool dude, but he is also the one putting together the logo for this whole thing. So once again, thank you sir. Now, let’s get into his posts.

Dracula
Frankenstein
The Mummy
The Invisible Man
Bride of Frankenstein
The Wolf Man
Abbott ant Costello Meet Frankenstein
The Ritual
Creature From The Black Lagoon
The Monster Squad
To The Devil A Daughter
Monster House
The Witches
I Am Alone
Happy Death Day

Thank you for all that, Craggus. Appreciate it.

Now, just as a general shoutout: Jia Wei AKA. JW AKA. Film and Nuance

Now, what I mean with the “Shoutout” thing in his introduction is because he had actually signed on to take part in this, however he never actually got around to making any posts for us. But since he was signed up I thought I’d at least give him a shoutout. He’s an incredibly talented writer and overall really nice guy, so he deserves all the visits he can get (same with all of these people). So click the “Film and Nuance” link in his intro to go there and give him some love.

Well, that’s about it for this. Huge thanks to my little spookers for delivering great stuff. And of course, a huge thanks to any and all people who popped in to read my stuff this month… I appreciate so god damn much. That’s it for the Month of Spooks 2017!
Have a good one!

 

Movie Review: Van Helsing (2004)

The Month of Spooks continues. And what’s this? An adventure movie featuring classic monsters? That’s cool. I mean, how could it possibly go wrong?

Ladies and gentlemen… “Van Helsing”.

The story follows legendary monster hunter Van Helsing (Hugh Jackman) as he travels to Transylvania with a friar named Carl (David Wenham). Why are they traveling to Transylvania? Obviously they’re traveling there to kill Dracula (Richard Roxburgh). So now we have our adventure plot featuring classic monsters. And is it any good? No… it’s bad. There’s no point in the plot where I’m even remotely interested in what is happening. They have a fun idea that could make for a fun little easy-breezy adventure plot. But it somehow manages to be both paper-thin and convoluted at the same time. It’s also duller than dishwater, fucking boring. And the tone is inconsistent, at best. The plot here is bad. I’m not gonna try to put it in a more elaborate way… it’s bad.

The characters have motivations (sort of)… but I never found myself giving a single shit about any of them. Hugh Jackman plays the titular Van Helsing, monster hunter extraordinaire. He has an okay motivation for what he does (sort of), but it never plays into the plot in any significant way, so I could never care about it. And Hugh Jackman… I love Hugh Jackman, but he’s not very good in this. Kate Beckinsale plays a woman that Van Helsing runs into pretty early on, and she’s somehow important to it all because she’s related to some big shot person. It was mentioned like twice and it was so poorly delivered that it never stuck to my mind. She’s supposed to be a badass lady, which is something I like seeing in a movie… but here she comes off as more of a lucky idiot, an idiot savant as it’s usually called. And her attempt at an accent here? Nope, no good. Beckinsale is bad in this. David Wenham plays Carl, the friar that is joining Van Helsing on this journey. He’s meant as a comic relief, but he never really says anything funny. Wenham is… okay in the role. Richard Roxburgh plays Dracula in this and his performance is awful… but in the right way. The performance has more ham than a Christmas buffet, and it made me laugh. It doesn’t really give the movie any points, but it at least made some scenes easier to get through than others. There are talented actors in this, but none of them are particularly good in it.

The score for the movie was composed by Alan Silvestri and it is pretty good. Here’s why it doesn’t work though… the overall quality of everything else is so low that this epic and booming score doesn’t quite match up with what’s happening on screen. It just feels off.

This movie was directed by Stephen Sommers and he did a meh job. It feels so bland and uninteresting that nothing about what I was seeing interested me. The action too has a sever lack of tension… and impact… and fun… it’s fucking boring. There’s also an overload of shitty CG. And to those giving the “Well, it was the early 2000s” argument”: The final “Lord of the Rings” movie came out the year before and the CG in that looks amazing. There was also an overload of it. Sure, there were a few props, costumes, and sets that looked pretty good, but they rarely got as much focus as the terrible computer effects.

This movie hasn’t been particularly well received. On Rotten Tomatoes it has a 23% positive rating. On Metacritic it has a score of 35/100. Roger Ebert gave it 3/4 stars (Wut?). And on imdb.com it has a score of 6,0/10.

“Van Helsing” is bad… just bad. It has a bad plot, bad characters, bad performances, okay music, and bad directing. Time for my final score. *Ahem*. My final score for “Van Helsing” is a 4,32/10. I didn’t like it and I would recommend skipping it.

My review of “Van Helsing” is now completed.

*Annoyed groan*

“Pacific Rim: Uprising” trailer!

Hello there, ladies and gents. Time for some trailer talk. So let’s do it.

So we recently got our first real trailer for “Pacific Rim: Uprising”, the sequel to Guillermo Del Toro’s super badass mech movie from 2013. And in this we follow John Boyega who plays the son of Idris Elba’s character from the first first movie. And there are giant monsters called Kaiju that the good guys have to fight with the help of giant mechs called Jaegers. And we see the return of both Charlie Day and Burn Gorman in this trailer. So what do I think of this trailer? The trailer is pretty straight-forward, but the movie looks like a lot of badass fun. And a bit of Boyega goes a long way. So yeah, I’m pretty excited. “Pacific Rim: Uprising” is set to be released in the first half of 2018. I say first half because the United States will get it in March and we here in Sweden will get it in late May (which is horseshit).

What are your thoughts? Are you excited for “Pacific Rim: Uprising”? And what did you think of the first movie? Leave any and all thoughts in the comments!
Have a good one and enjoy the trailer!

Announcing The Month of Spooks 2017!!!

Ladies, gentlemen, and others… I am very proud to announce, for the third year in a row… THE MONTH OF SPOOKS!

For those of you who are new/not aware, The Month of Spooks is my special little “series” that I do every October since 2015. And since October will be here pretty soon, I thought it was time to finally make an official announcement about it… and here it is. So what exactly will happen during the Month of Spooks? Well, I don’t have any set-in-stone plans, but I have some vague ideas, mainly about a couple of horror movies that I want to review. Other than that, I have no specific plans for it (Lucky for me that there’s time left for me to think about it). Last year I was lucky to have a couple of people join in on it, with them making posts on their blogs in the name of the Spooks. And I’m hoping to get some people along for the ride this year as well. Now, I don’t have anywhere that people can sign up for it as of writing this, but I might be able to fix something for that. In the meantime, if you are interested in signing up for The Month of Spooks, you could always send a DM my way on twitter (@TheMarckoguy), if you have a twitter account. If you don’t… then maybe have some patience.

Well, that’s really all I had to say. Not a lot of things I could say in this announcement. So… prepare your butts for The Month of Spooks!
Have a good one.

Movie Review: The Mist (2007)

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What’s up, people? Time to continue “The Month of Spooks” with another frightening movie review. And it is the second time we are taking a look at a movie based on a story by author Stephen King. Now let’s not stand around and make fools of ourselves, let us move on to the review!

Ladies and gentlemen, do not enter… “The Mist”.

This movie follows artist David Drayton (Thomas Jane) as he and a bunch of other people get stuck in a supermarket because of a mysterious mist that brings out a lot of blood-thirsty creatures. So now they have to try to defend themselves inside of the supermarket. They have no idea what’s causing the mist and they have no idea where the creatures come from, all they know is that they have to survive. And was this survival story well executed? Yeah, I’d say so. Once again it is one of those situations of the idea not being original, but maybe the execution is done well enough. And I thought it was good. Not great, but good. I don’t know what to say really. I guess I can say that I thought it was pretty tense and suspenseful at times and I have to say that the ending is pretty tragic and maybe the best aspect of the plot. So yeah, good plot.

The characters in the movie are pretty much cookie cutter Stephen King characters. You have the main character dad who does art of some kind, you have the child, you have the elderly black guy, the religious nut and feel free to check off this list on your own. But how is the acting? It’s… good, I guess. Thomas Jane plays the main character of the movie and he does a fine job as the guy… except when he has to do somethign emeotional, then he kind of sucks. But I didn’t expect too much from him since I’ve never considered him that great of an actor. Andre Braugher plays the elderly black guy in the movie and he does a good job. The child actor who plays Jane’s son does a fine job, I have seen both worse and better child performances before, so I don’t feel that this kid adds or detracts anything from the movie. What was kind of fun though with the actors in this movie was how I saw a good amount of people who would later be in “The Walking Dead” which director Frank Darabont had a hand in. Jeffrey DeMunn, Laurie Holden, Melissa McBride and Sam Witwer all appear in this movie at some point and that was fun seeing since i like “The Walking Dead”. Anyway, that derailed a little bit. Uhm… acting was fine and the characters were meh.

The score for the movie was provided by Mark Isham and I have to say that so far it is the best part of the movie. It isn’t something I can see myself listening to again, but it’s definitely a good score that really fit the movie. And to be honest, there wasn’t really anything sticking out except for one track called “The Host of Seraphim” which appeared near the end of the movie. Every other tracks in the score was fine, but that track is, no joke, fucking amazing. Held up by an eerie & slowly building backing note and the gorgeous vocals of Lisa Gerrard, it is one of the reasons why the score for the movie holds the movie up so well. That track is just amazing and the score overall is pretty good.

Okay, so far the plot has been fine, the acting fine and the score good, but is there something great about the movie? Yes there is… the camerawork is pretty damn great. It perfectly fits the eerie and a little creepy mood this movie conveys and actually manages to capture some pretty great shots. And I have to say that some of the writing in the movie was pretty great, and I am mainly talking about certain pieces of dialogue. And something I noticed early on in the movie which is kind of cool is that we see Thomas Jane working on a painting/poster which appears to be Roland from Stephen King’s “The Dark Tower” books. As a fan of those books I just kind of thought that was a cool little easter egg.

This movie has gotten pretty good reception. On Rotten Tomatoes it has a 73% positive rating. On Metacritic it has a score of 58/100. Roger Ebert gave the movie 2/4 stars. And on imdb.com it has a score of 7,2/10.

“The Mist” is a real mixed bag of a movie. It has a decent story, decent acting, good music and fantastic camera work/directing. Time for my final score. Woaw, look at all that mist. What’s that in the mist? Wait, is that… Jeff? Oh my god, Jeff. Where have you been, asshole? Screw it! Do you have something for me? *Jeff gives envelope and disappears into the mist*. My final score for “The Mist” is a 7,99/10. I think it’s worth a rental.
Rent it

My review of “The Mist” is now completed.

Hearing Toby Jones tell someone to shut the fuck up is just magical.